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The Perfect Army
 
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The Perfect Army
 
 
07-20-2008, 06:05 AM
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This oneshot is set in an AU, or alternate universe.
In this AU, Mario never existed, and Bowser was able to conquer the Mushroom Kingdom with ease. Goombas aren't a species, but is a result of directly changing people.



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"The goombas are mindless slaves," the magikoopa remarked as he surveyed the army that extended far into the distance, from a balcony extending from a his superior's castle, colouring the land a distinct brown colour, "they will do anything you order. They do not have fear, emotions, anything that will make a bad soldier."

When his comment gathered no response, he continued, apparently obsessed with the sound of his own voice, "of course, thanks to our magic, we were able to change the inefficient people of the Mushroom Kingdom into a resourceful war machine. They will tell you anything, and follow all directions with no reluctancy whatsoever. They do not think."

Bowser, the king of all koopas, said nothing. He had nothing to add, no questions. The speed of the transformation was quite remarkable. Two days before, he had ordered part of the entire population of the Mushroom Kingdom to be "processed" after his conquest. They all had memories, emotions, families, friends. All of which would have to go, as they did not fit in with Lord Koopa's idea of a "perfect army".

And now they were conformed, equal, identical. All identity had been lost, and with it, the lives of what had been normal people. Only shells were left, forever changed by magic. Their souls had been carved out.

Walking amongst the perfect formation of goombas, Bowser looked at each one closely. Each one had the same shape. Each one was the same height. Each one had the same face. Each one had the same expressionless stare. Each one was looking in the same direction. But each one was aware and ready.

"You." Bowser said clearly, words freezing the air as they travelled, to a goomba he was facing.

"Yes, Lord Bowser. What do you wish from me?" the response coming equally clearly from the goomba.

"Tell me what you saw exactly three hours prior." commanded Bowser. He was testing the memory of these - not robots, but very close. The magikoopas had optimized memory in this batch, especially.

"I was not awake. Nor were half of my comrades. We sleep exactly at the same time for two hours per day in shifts. I dreamed." the voice replied, almost robotic in tone.

"What were you dreaming about?" Bowser questioned. Were they able to remember dreams?

The goomba thought for a second before replying, possibly searching his thoughts, "I was dreaming of a land, a world, where Koopas did not exist, a world where my comrades were different from each other." He did not hesitate to say this, as his emotions had been removed.

So they were able to remember dreams. Interesting. "Why were there no Koopas?"

"They were all dead."

Bowser, feeling curiosity rising inside him, continued to question him. "Because?" he inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"They had been defeated in battle."

"By whom?" Bowser partly knew what was going to come next.

"Us. Goombas."

As soon as the reply was heard by King Koopa, Bowser stabbed the goomba with his claws on the spot, killing him instantly.

The rest of the army did not move, nor did they even flinch.

Bowser stood on the spot, turning toward the magikoopa. The magikoopa trembled, knowing what was going to happen now. There had been a flaw in the processing.

"Kill them all. Start again."



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It's an experiment, not my best work. I wrote this in an hour.
Please leave reviews or comments. If you liked this, recommend it to your friends.
 
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07-20-2008, 06:13 AM
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That's quite good, an interesting concept. I like the ending the most.
 
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07-20-2008, 06:16 AM
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So... any criticism?
 
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07-20-2008, 06:21 AM
  #4 (permalink)  
That was good, but it seemed too much like a rip off of star wars. Other than that, this is very, very good.
 
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07-20-2008, 06:22 AM
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lmfao star wars?

i got the idea while thinking about communism lmao

note how the goombas refer to each other as comrades
 
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07-20-2008, 06:23 AM
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It's not perfect, of course, but there aren't any noticeable flaws as far as I can see. It was an interesting read, even though it was short.
 
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07-20-2008, 06:24 AM
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I was thinking of developing the character of the goomba further by having a flashback to when he was a normal toad.

Then I was like "screw dat".
 
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07-20-2008, 06:32 AM
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Its quite well thought. I like it.
 
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07-20-2008, 06:33 AM
  #9 (permalink)  
QUOTE:
Originally Posted by edmde View Post
lmfao star wars?

i got the idea while thinking about communism lmao

note how the goombas refer to each other as comrades
Well I was thinking it was like how the clones were made obediant and wouldn't ask questions
 
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07-20-2008, 06:39 AM
  #10 (permalink)  
u watch 2 much geoge lucis bro
 
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